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GRE Writing issue 9

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GRE Writing Áß±Þ½ÇÀü
NAME: GRE Áß±Þ½ÇÀü 7PM, Take-home
3_
Assignment: Take home 3 - ISS
UE #9
9. In any field of endeavor,
it is impossible to make a significant contribution without first being strongly influenced by past achievements within that field.
Write a response in which you
discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
A past achievement in a certa
in field may affect a person to have a profound motivation by providing hope that they also can make such an accomplishment. While this makes perfect sense, it is absolutely possible to make a substantial contribution without being strongly influenced by it of the same field, as seen in beverage industry and IT field.
To begin with, many successes
are created by deviating from the original purpose. An example for this would be Coca-Cola. A pharmacist was developing a flu treatment and came to conclusion it needs much better taste to be widely used. Therefore, he had to begin studying ways to improve taste and researching the kind of flavor that would best suit his medicine. And he finally changed the way people understood beverage by creating Coca-Cola. At the beginning, his intention was bound to medical field. Until this point, he might have been influenced by a medicine that treated patients so well which could be seen as a past achievement in medicine industry to him. One would doubt that he decided to make a medicine because he was aspired by a beverage. Yet, he found other need in his own development, the taste, and changed his intention to a completely new field, the beverage industry. To simply put, his clout to the beverage industry was affected by an achievement in a different field.
Furthermore, it is plausible
some breakthroughs are made without seeing a past achievement. For instance, in IT field, a new concept called data science started to be know in public in about 2010. In brief, it is about gathering vast amount of data and information both on-and-off-line, and analyze them to give useful insights. The technology had to be devised to facilitate businesses, military and government the use of information that is being created in real time more than what we could imagine in the past. A successful product of data science people commonly know is PeopleYouMayKnow function of LinkedIn, the professional networking service company. In involves with gathering all the data stored in your computer and online server relevant to your connections, and link you to the LinkedIn users with the same profiles in your connections. The product became a huge hit and was adopted to other major companies such as Facebook and Amazon. Either the concept of data science or an accomplishment in regard to it did not exist in the past, but the main creator of the function, DJ Patil, made such a breakthrough in the field.
Overall, past achievements wi
thin the same field is not mandatory for one to make great deal of contribution as they can lead to making contributions to other fields. Moreover, they are sometimes not even available as seen in the world of data science. Still, a successful product that provides an innovative way to build network online could be created. In brief, substantial positive impact in a certain field does not have to come after past accomplishments within that field.
Respond to the specific task
instructions 1 2 3 4 5 6 Overall Score:
Consider the complexities of
the issue 1 2 3 4 5 6
Organize, develop, & express
your ideas 1 2 3 4 5 6
Support your ideas with relev
ant reasons and/or examples 1 2 3 4 5 6
Control elements of standard
written English 1 2 3 4 5 6
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